You may see leadership as something that you’ve developed throughout your adult life as you’ve changed roles, advanced within an organisation, and/or started to lead teams of people. And while you may credit your childhood experiences like playing a team sport, being involved in organised activities, or being part of your school’s Student Leadership Team as influences on your leadership style … which of course they were … most leaders are not aware of Attachment Styles and the way Attachment Styles influence how they show up in the workplace. In this 3 part discussion, we look at what Attachment Styles are, how they influence you as a leader, and what you can do about your Style.
What are Attachment Styles? Glad you asked! Attachment Styles are the bonds that develop in childhood through the influence of our major caregivers. In childhood, these bonds are based on the child’s need for safety, security, and protection, paramount in infancy and childhood.
John Bowlby, who started the discussion on Attachment Styles in the late 1950’s, theorised infants who have caregivers that are in close proximity, accessible and attentive most of the time feel loved, secure and confident, and in turn develop a Secure Attachment to this caregiver. This Secure Attachment means the infant is more likely to explore their environment, play with others, and be sociable. If however, the infant has a caregiver who is absent, present but not accessible or attentive, present but over involved or over bearing, abusive or neglectful most of the time they feel anxious, desperate or depressed, and in turn develop an Anxious or Avoidant Attachment to this caregiver. An Anxious Attachment means the infant is more likely to be distressed, less likely to explore their environment, and can ‘cling’ to social interactions. An Avoidant Attachment means the infant is more likely to be ambivalent, detached from their environment, and can ‘avoid’ getting close to others.
Research suggests approximately 50% of the population are Securely Attached, 20% Anxiously Attached, and 25% Avoidantly Attached (with the remaining 5% Chaotically Attached – this is a whole other discussion).
Wanting to know more? The next part of our discussion focusses on how Attachment Styles influence leadership.